SO! Since my love sent me those flowers today - I’m in a very lovely dovey mood and just thankful to have finally found the most amazing man in the world. Seriously, I was beginning to think that all relationships are drama filled and have heartbreak and tears and disappointment. And then Hec came into my life and proved me wrong. I will admit the first few months of our relationship were very rocky. We were both getting out of bad loooong term relationships, his 3 years mine 5 years. I was married with a kid and he was heart broken and felt betrayed. We both broke up with our Ex’s around the same time, actually the same week and were really there for each other and friends, trying to help each other get through it all, we were both fucked over in our past relationships in different ways and it was nice to be able to turn to each other as friends and as two people going through something very similar. Then despite open talks about trying to avoid it, and joking that we know its going to happen one day inevitably our friendship turned into more. Like I said it was hard at first. I had guilt that I should be trying harder to make my marriage work and every time I decided that I need to give it another chance Scott would do something that would remind me why I’m not with him, hit me, steal my car, take my money claiming I owed him, refuse to let me see Kendra things like that, that would remind me of what hell I have been through the past 5 years. The same went for Hec, every time he decided to give it another chance with his ex she would do something that made him realize why it is he had to break up with her. We really did try to make it work with our ex’s and we were both supportive to each others attempts to do so because again, we were going through the same kind of thing and knew how each other felt. But enough about that. Slowly but surely our relationship just bloomed into something amazing. Something that after we were able to let go of our past relationships and move on with ourselves we were able to see how perfect we were for each other. He’s a pessimist and I’m an optimist, he makes sure that I keep my feet on the ground and I make sure to lift him off the ground. I'm super motivated and he’s laid back, we meet in the middle and through that enjoy life more than we ever have before. He has become the most amazing father figure to Kendra and is just plain great with her and loves her more than anything (who couldn’t she’s perfect! Lol such a mom thing to say)
Our life together is so fair and so giving and loving. We cook dinner together every night and though that may not seem that extraordinary, we have so much fun with it. We take Kendra to the park or hiking or somewhere family oriented every Sunday and not only is that her fun day but its our day to just be the family we are and enjoy ourselves, not care about bills, work, ect. He tells me every day how beautiful I am and how he can’t believe he is with someone like me. He is never ever shy to let me know how attracted he is to me, what a great mother I am, how he can’t wait to marry me and spend the rest of his life with me (I always tell him to not talk about that until I’m officially divorced lol). Its really a different feeling for me. When I was with Scott, yes we did have out good times here and there. But really, I constantly was walking on egg shells, constantly feeling terrible about my post baby body and he would let it be known that he wasn’t attracted to my when I was pregnant and after, I mean common now, that’s not something I could help that much. But hec on the other hand always always makes me feel like I am the most amazing woman, he gives me the confidence that Scott took away. He always tells me how proud he is of all my accomplishments and how hard I work and my promotions and just who I am as a person a mother and a girlfriend. Yeah we are early in our life together but we have delt with things that most people in their 40s have not had to deal with. We have been through the worst of times, he worked in the construction biz and when the economy bs happened he was out of work – we have a $1400 rent among other bills and with just my paycheck we weren’t even making ends meet. We had gone through two deaths in our family, a divorce, going through a custody battle, and many other things that don’t need to be known by anyone but us. But its been hard and we always are able to hold each others hand and make it trough. I had days where I would just break down because I didn’t know what we would do and he sat there and held me up like no one else could have. He had days were he was so down and out because he felt our problems were because of him and I was able to sit by him and tell him we will make it work and we always are able to help each other through unselfishly.
After everything we have been through we know the rest of our life’s will be a piece of cake and we have been beaten down enough that we know we can get through anything.
I love how unselfish our love is, how honest and devoted our love is. I have not been this happy in so long. And yes of course we have fights, who doesn't? but I’m in a good mood and a super lovie mood right now and choose to ignore those fights and pretend they don’t ever ever happen haha. no no, we do fight but we are mature about it and are able to get mad at each other, cool off (well im usually the one who needs to cool off, im a bit of a hot head lol) and then figure something out to make sure it doesn't happen again or if it was just a one time thing that doesn't need to be talked about then we just have hot make up sex and forget why we were even fighting haha, and who doesn't love hot make up sex?
So anyways I guess what I’m trying to say with all this rambling bullshit is thank you baby for sending me those flowers today and making today and everyday amazing. And to tell all you lovebirds that relationships are work but they should be 100 times more love, happiness and greatness than they are hard work. It should come easy to love one another, and have fun with each other. It should never be lies, hurt, tears, eggshells. Be who you are and if they love you for exactly who you are, flaws and all – how can you go wrong?
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